“Get a grip on reality”

Even good guys get bored and lonely, and not all wives are the most dutiful. Marriage dictates that you aren’t supposed to be with anyone but her, but rules are made to be broken, right? So, if she’s not doing it for you, it’s better for the both of you if you find someone else to do it instead before you wind up blowing up at her for it. If you’re looking for a fun affair to keep you busy on long “work” nights that you would have originally spent at your desk agonizing about going home to your wife, you have to make sure you have the perfect alibi to avoid suspicion.

The affair itself won’t be difficult to find – there are plenty of women out there looking for a no-strings-attached fling who would love to help you have a good time. Finding a woman to sleep with you is infinitely easier than finding one to commit to you in a relationship, so don’t spend your time worrying about that. Worry instead about how to keep your lies valid and hole-free so your wife doesn’t ever find out. Feed her lines about how stressful your job is lately, and how much of a jerk your boss is for keeping you and the guys late at work to finish everything up. Seem as genuinely distressed and frustrated as you can – if you act excited to be working overtime at your job, she’s sure to suspect that something isn’t quite right. It’s a clich