Three Ways to Sharpen Your Image and Get Laid

You’ve already landed your wife, but maybe you’re feeling a little trapped. She’s probably let herself go, but that doesn’t mean you have to. While we like lounging around in our boxers and playing video games on the weekend as much as the next guy, that’s not going to get you any action. The older you get, the more effort you’re going to have put in to hooking some hotties, so we came up with a few tips that have worked for us.


The thing about girls is that they like a well-dressed man, and you’re already working overtime if she knows you’re married. If she doesn’t know now, she’ll probably find out, so make it worth her while. You don’t have to spend money on a new wardrobe, especially since it will arouse your wife’s suspicions, but there are a few things you can do to slick up your look. The first one is going to a tailor and getting your old pants and shirts fitted to your actual body type. It’s not as expensive as buying a new pair of pants, and it makes you look like you know how to dress. Your wife may wonder what looks different, but she won’t be able to put her finger on it, and she won’t catch you spending a lot of money. Any guy buying a whole new wardrobe is going to look shady, but just a few tweaks are going to make a world of difference and no one will know better. Girls need a good reason to date a married man, but you need a reason to put your neck out, so make sure she’s worth it.


"Get a clean shave"

“Get a clean shave”

Similarly to wardrobe, you can’t go getting a whole new look, or else your wife will be suspicious. If you’ve had the same haircut and facial hair for a decade, dramatically changing your hairstyle isn’t exactly the stealthiest move. Besides, you’ve gone with a specific look for this long for a reason, so there’s probably something about it that’s served you well. Keep the basics the same, like the length of your hair, but inject a little style into it. Go to a barber and get a proper shave. Check out some hair product that’s made for men. You might be the rugged type, but if you want girls to think you’re attractive, you’ve got to give them something to reach for. What works for your wife probably won’t work for the type of girl you want on the side.


"Get back in shape"

“Get back in shape”

This one is simple: you have to work out. Every guy should keep in shape, not only because it’s healthy, but also because you don’t want to let yourself go and get into a slump. Then it’ll be impossible to get back to where you were, and that much harder to find some relief from your marriage when it gets to be too much. Your wife is going to be sitting on the couch, eating macaroni and cheese and watching some worst-dressed celebrity marathon, and you’re going to be right there with her if you don’t keep yourself in shape. Hit the gym and do some reps, and maybe while you’re there, you’ll even meet the hot girl of your dreams.

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