Women are a lot of work. They take up a lot of time, energy, and money. By keeping a girl around, you’re committing to spending that time, energy, and money on her, even if it’s only the bare minimum required to keep her happy.
Affairs can take a toll on a man. The more the affair takes a toll on you, the more you’ll wind up showing that stress to your wife. In that case, she’s going to get suspicious a lot faster than she would if you’d kept the affair short in the first place.
Know when it’s time to call it quits.
There are a few signs that an affair has run its course, and it’s time to move on. Some of them are obvious, but some you might not understand at first, and those are some of the ones you have to be the most careful not to mess up, just in case it gets you caught.
The first sign you should give up an affair is that you’re getting comfortable with the affair.
“Comfortable” is for your wife. “Comfortable” is for the old shoes and underwear that are nice and broken in, that you should probably throw out but don’t because they fit so well.
“Comfortable” is NOT the word you should have for your affair. An affair should be new, exciting, and should thrill and excite you every time you think about it. If you’re not excited to see the girl every time you go to meet her, it’s probably time to move on.
The second sign is that your girlfriend becomes more work than your actual wife.
Your girlfriend is supposed to make you less bored. That’s just about all you need from her. She’s supposed to be fun and exciting, not something you have to psych yourself up to deal with. Your girlfriend is supposed to be someone you meet, have a date with, and go back to her place or a hotel with to hook up. It’s supposed to be easy and fun.
If you start feeling like you’re dealing with TWO wives, run like hell in the other direction. You never want to feel like you’re shirking your obligation to your girlfriend-she’s supposed to be the escape from obligations!
The third sign is that your girlfriend starts asking, “Where is this going in the long run?”
This one should be obvious. Just get out.
The fourth (and most important) sign is your girlfriend starts asking too many questions about your home life.
This is a BIG warning sign.
If your girlfriend is suddenly curious about your life, your work, your home address, or your wife, you need to start looking for someone else immediately. This girl is almost certainly thinking about finding out exactly who you are, for one of a few reasons. Here are a few of the reasons a girl could be phishing for your information:
- She feels bad about participating in infidelity and being “The other woman,” and she wants to contact your wife and come clean with her
- She thinks you’re going to leave her and wants to make you pay by ruining your home life
- She thinks she could blackmail you by threatening to talk to your wife about the affair
- She thinks you two are a lot more serious than you are, and wants to move the relationship forward a step by becoming a permanent part of your life
Obviously, all of these are REALLY BAD. You want to get out of a relationship immediately if your girl shows any sign of these behaviors, and hopefully next time, choose one that is free of this kind of behavior.
How long is too long?
On average, it has less to do with the length of the relationship than it does with the time spent together. Remember always that this is an affair, not a real relationship, and you don’t want to spend your time “moving forward” with her. Five dates/weekends/trysts is about the maximum you should hold to, ten if you are REALLY convinced that this girl is amazing in the sack and you think she’ll be cool with ending it that late.
On a time scale, this shouldn’t be any longer than two months. Any longer than that, and you start to fall into the trap of considering her a permanent part of your life, when she should really just be a transient one in a sea of many. That’s why you have an affair, after all. You already HAVE a permanent home life. Having a mistress is great if you’re a painter from the 1800s, but you’re a busy guy, and mistresses are expensive, and your wife knows how to read Internet search histories.