Of course, the most important thing you want to know is about how you can keep your wife in the dark about your affair. Married dating is hard if you don’t know what you’re doing. The divorce rate is sky high, and while a hefty number of guys know what they’re doing, there are even more who have no idea.
Obviously, all of us are still married. That doesn’t mean there haven’t been scares, but we’ve been successful so far in keeping our wives from finding out what we do on our little outings.
So, what’s the most important thing to remember when you’re starting an affair while still married?
Treat your wife normally.
If you normally buy her flowers once a week, keep buying her flowers once a week. If you’re normally a slob who leaves his dirty underwear on the ground, now is NOT the time to suddenly turn in to a white tornado who does all the laundry.
If you start treating her different than usual, she WILL start to notice that something is up. Women don’t have any special powers of “intuition,” but they do have brains, and many of them use those brains just fine. If she gets curious and starts looking further into your behavior, expect a lot of questions like, “What brought this on?” and “What made you so happy today?” and “Wow, what did I do to deserve this?”
The other thing to remember is that women talk. Chances are, even if you’re good at keeping your affair discreet, one of your wife’s friends probably has a husband that isn’t (remember, 70 percent of men admit to cheating). At least one of her friends will probably tell her that one of the major signs her husband is having an affair is acting nicer than normal. Talk about nice guys always finishing last!
Keep your wife aware of when you “travel.”
The best way to keep your affairs secret is by having them out of town. Travel affairs offer the least risk of any affairs, and you don’t have to worry about your girlfriend suddenly deciding that she feels bad about the whole thing and has to come clean with your wife.
However, something you should make sure of is to always let her know when you’ll be out of town. Make sure your little trips are going to be routine enough that she doesn’t get curious. The last thing you want is for your wife to get curious, so make sure she has no reason to do so.
If you can structure trips around travel for your work, you’re a lucky man. Not only will she expect that you’re going to be out of town for a certain amount of time, but she’ll also expect that there are “travel expenses” you’ll run into on a trip, and you can use that money to DISCREETLY buy your girl on the side a little something, or take her out somewhere nice.
Discreet is, of course, the key word. According to a survey on MSN.com, the number one reason most women find out their husband is cheating on them is by noticing discrepancies in his spending.
This isn’t something little, like noticing a little bit has gone missing. That’s easy to explain. These guys are not very good at hiding their tracks, however, and routinely made purchases on joint bank accounts and credit cards that their wives immediately saw to places like fancy restaurants, concert tickets, and department stores.
Don’t be that guy! It’s not that hard to keep your affair a secret, as long as you’re not an idiot about it. This poll leads us to one of the very most important things you can do to avoid being caught:
Get a separate bank account.
Say it has a better interest rate. Say it’s better for your retirement fund. Say it’s something you got through work. Don’t say anything at all and don’t let her know about it.
Whatever you decide to say (or not say), you should absolutely have a separate bank account. You can start having part of your paychecks deposited there, or you can withdraw a bit in cash from your joint bank account before putting it into the other one.
However, you should ABSOLUTELY still pay for everything on your date in cash. No matter how careful you are with your new bank account, there’s still a chance that it will one day be discovered.
Instead of using it as a debit account, get a savings account. Then you’ll earn a bit of interest, and use it only to withdraw cash to spend on your lady. That keeps you from writing checks and using a debit card at places that can be incriminating.
Using these tips, it’s totally possible to keep your wife in the dark!